How did a computer scientist such as Geoffrey Hinton manage to win a Nobel Prize in physics when computer science already has its own Nobel Prize equivalent in the Turing Awards?

[The basic structure of artificial neural networks] has close similarities with spin models in statistical physics applied to magnetism or alloy theory. This year’s Nobel Prize in Physics recognizes research exploiting this connection to make breakthrough methodological advances in the field of ANN.

Whatever.

They then move on to selectively provide their own version of history. But hey, it’s OK. They wanted controversy, didn’t they? Whatever.

I vibrated my dogs shock collar while it was eating my other dog’s food and now it won’t eat. How do I fix this problem?

[Older voice] "Mmm. What about Hinton, he's widely regarded? Nobody got fired for buying IBM"

"Naah, Linnainmaa is a Finn. Can't give it to a bloody Finnish mathematician. Let's go for drinks. Brännvin anyone?"

My 11 million SEK, Dr Jo.

Do you think Lady Gaga and Celine Dion have rehearsed separately for their performance at the Olympics opening ceremony?

Why wait any longer for the world to begin?

You can have your cake and eat it too

(Mumbles of assent)

To those people in the world who have access to universal healthcare, what experiences could you share with Americans in order for us to understand how it affects your life (positively or negatively)?

"Good idea, but how can we wangle something that says 'Physics'?"

In awarding prizes, the Nobel Committees often seem only marginally more competent than MTG is at explaining meteorology. And if they can give a literature prize for lyrics like:

"Good point, I'm sure we can swing it. And let's tack on Hopfield while we're about it."

Coating satellites with super-black paint Vantablack could help fight light pollution crisis - Space

"Where can we shoehorn it in? Chemistry is easy 'cos AlphaFold; but what about physics? A bit more challenging, right?"

Why wait any longer for the one you love?

In December 1973, when Kissinger was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize, comedian Tom Lehrer dropped his mic and stamped on it—satire had just died.

What should I do if a girl whom I love asks me to be her friend?

Whatever.

(Bob Dylan, Nobel Prize for Literature, 2016)

There you go.^†

What are some hard truths that MAGA needs to hear?

"Didn't he do something with Boltzmann in it? That sounds physics-y. RBMs and stuff, eh?"

… then anything is possible. There’s no rule that a Nobel Prize has to make sense.^*

A fly on the wall at the Royal Swedish Academy of Sciences

What was your best revenge story?

[Younger voice] "But wait a minute, Ising-Lenz goes back to the 1920's. And didn't Hinton plagiarise rather a lot? He also didn't invent modern backprop, did he, that's Linnainmaa? And Amari preceded Hopfield, too. That's not a good look."

When he's standing, in front of you

^* Fibiger got the 1926 Medicine prize for the discovery of Spiroptera carcinoma (Don’t ask).

How do I know if I am a bitch? I try to be a nice person but people often jokingly call me a bitch. My family calls me a bitch sometimes too.

Fortunately, we are privy to the discussion that led up to this:

"Hey guys, AI is pretty big so let's centre our prizes on it this year. We can get some attention, and it's all about advertising, at the end of the day, isn't it?"

^† They rationalise their decision thusly:

Why did my bipolar girlfriend split up with me?